The main point of the first author is that sexism and sexist language does not only affect women. Even though women are commonly thought of as the abused or unequal sex men might be the ones that have the harder time.
The main point of the second author is that women aren’t unmarked and that there is no typical woman. She mainly argues that women do have a hard time and that they feminists and laws that are unfair to men shouldn’t be considered male bashing because there are legitimate reasons for them. For men you can be a “typical guy” but for a women there is always a certain way to describe her. For instance a man with a buzz cut, wearing jeans and a t-shirt you can’t assume that much of him whereas a woman wearing tight clothing or a low cut shirt is assumed to be looking for a good time.
One of the parts of the first reading that stood out to me the most was paragraph 25 on page 135. “If he does not, he will be labeled as impotent. While it is sexist to call a woman frigid, it is acceptable to call a man impotent” “the sex manuals are ready to warn him that if he reaches orgasm before a specified time, he is guilty of premature ejaculation.” This idea really seems quite unfair to me as it hold men to a higher standard when it comes to what gender is supposed to approach the other. It also makes a good point about who has the ultimate liability in sex. While not wanting to go into detail, it is considered a problem that is the man’s fault if he is unable to please the woman or if he orgasms too soon. Women are capable of being sexually bad or having sexual shortcomings too, such as once having heard a friend refer to someone as a dead fish, because they didn’t participate that much. It is unfair to call men sexist for ways in which women are treated differently and then not admit to anything affecting men as being sexist towards men. It is hypocritical to say you need to treat women equally and hold them to the same standard as men, and continue to hold prejudices against men and get angry at them when they don’t treat you in a chivalrous way as if they you can’t open a door for yourself.
The other part of the reading that stood out to me the most was paragraph 27 on page 136. “The law has been particularly obtuse in recognizing fathers as parents, as evidenced by the awarding of child custody to mothers in 90% of divorce cases.” “In one case a father’s petition for custody of his four-year-old son was denied because, as the family court judge said, “Fathers don’t make good mothers.” This paragraph really bothered me, because I find it hypocritical for men to be accountable for child support, but not having any choice in what to do with the child, such as whether they should have the child or have an abortion, or who the child lives with if the father does want to raise him. For them to hold fathers just as accountable when it comes to supporting the child, and then not treating them as an equal parent is not fair at all. Not to mention it ridiculous for women to say we’re sexist for saying women are typically the home maker when they themselves say things like “Fathers don’t make good mothers”. It’s just about as stupid as how it is seen as racist for white people to say nigga and not racist for black people to say nigga.
For the second reading I did not really agree with the statement on page 142 paragraph 16 that says “There is no unmarked woman” or how there are unmarked styles “like the men’s”. If she is trying to say that men dressed up in suits aren’t marked I think she would be wrong because you could always label their style as “business men”. Just like how a guy’s style can be expressed by calling him jock, fratty, emo, gothic, hipster, nerd, and other similar terms. If you are going to say that there is such a thing as an unmarked man, I would say I think there is a typical unmarked woman, whom I would consider as a stay at home wife that takes care of kids, cooks, and does the laundry. Although to say that would make people consider me sexist despite how much more often that is the case with women rather than men.
The second reading that stood out to me was paragraph 17 on page 142 that says “there is no woman’s hairstyle that can be called standard”. I think that there is a standard hairstyle for women, and that they just don’t realize it, because women are different men in that they take in the little details that men don’t. I couldn’t say anything about the differences between most girls hair, and I consider them having there hair in a ponytail being unmarked or typical. I think women are just being self conscious because I sometimes can’t even remember a girl’s hair color and especially eye color much less what style her hair was unless it was absolutely ridiculous and stood out.
There was a time when I was aware of not fitting in because I didn’t fit my prescribed role exactly as I should. Men are usually thought of as being the party responsible for the check when they go out to dinner with a girl, but I am usually running pretty low on money seeing as I’m an unemployed college student, so I have to pick and choose the times I pay for both the meals and the tip. One time a girl asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with her, and I told her that since I didn’t have flex I had to wait a couple hours till I could swipe a meal again. Instead of just waiting to go eat a meal we’ve both already paid for she suggested we go to Applebee’s. At this point I told her I didn’t have a car and she said it was fine because she did. What ended up happening was she showed up driving a 2010 mustang and saying how Ulysses S Grant was like her 5th generation grandpa, or something along those lines how she was related to him. She seemed pretty loaded so I didn’t feel bad about not paying for a girl’s meal for once, although I did feel a tiny bit bad when she offered to pay for my meal. I felt a little bit of shame when I didn’t drive or pay for dinner since I’m used to doing that, but I saved $15 for the cost of the meal so I’m still glad it happened. She was pretty good looking so I had a hot rich girl to lose by not paying, because I was afraid it would affect her opinion of me in a bad way. Although apparently I was right about her being loaded and not caring, because she came back and we watched a movie after dinner rather than just leaving. I saw myself in a different light after that and I don’t feel as bad about not paying for things for girls anymore since from experience I’ve noticed there parents typically give them a lot more money to spend than mine give me.
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